Life as a Medical Anomaly Part Nine
Cigarette smoke is the one thing I have been able to connect with my asthma as a sensitivity, something that my asthma seems to act up on when I smell it or around people who are smoking. Dealing with smokers when you have them in the family has been a hardship for me, I love spending time with my husband’s family as they accepted me from the moment they met me, but after the asthma attack during Christmas and the three weeks of an upper respiratory infection with a bit of pneumonia in January I have had to be leery. It is very difficult for one that has asthma to not be able to do certain things due to their breathing issues, and it can be a difficult thing to get others to understand if they have no history with any breathing issues.
Chest pain from the coughing attacks can leave you weak and exhausted, this feeling of tiredness leaving you with no energy or being able to truly think. Migraines for me come either out of the blue or from my asthma causing even more pain that radiates through my whole body. Wanting to do more than just simple things on the computer, but not having the energy to do so is very frustrating. I have online friends who have fibromyalgia and have read enough to get the gist of what is considered fibro fog, where thoughts and energy to do things is nonexistent, that is how it feels for me when I have major chest pain and been coughing a lot. Time during this seems to pass quickly and slowly at the same time, and there is the feeling of just staring off somewhere.
During these moments it is difficult to do many different tasks rather it be watching something, being able to focus on a particular task, or do something enjoyable like writing or reading. Being a creative person with certain health issues can be very frustrating. Working on these posts for helping others who have health issues to let them know they are not alone is truly awarding and not being able to do that due to my own health issues is difficult to say the least. Although natural ability to write poetry being able to write such information that literally bears a part of my life is never easy. You would think with all the poetry written that are personal that writing about my health issues would be simple and that is not true.
In my life it is easy to bear emotions in poetry, it is something that comes as natural to me as someone is to breathe. Not only has it been there to heal the emotions in my life, it was there when there was nothing else to turn to, but writing about my health is the complete opposite. Talking about the real fears and emotional hardship that comes with having my health issues is not something that goes on my top list of things to talk about. It stems back to when I was in grade school, being in special education for my speech problem, the fine motor skill issue I was born with, dealing with ridicule from that, and later my weight, talking about health issues have not been easy. This can be true for anyone that deals with health issues when they are young and deal with those that are hurtful toward them.
It is important if you know someone who has a difficult time expressing or feeling comfortable about talking about their health issues to be supportive. People with health issues that affect their everyday lives need someone who is caring, understanding, and not going to judge them. Be encouraged if you are one with health issues that you are not alone, even when you feel that there is no one there for you. Sometimes one has to seek and be patient to find someone who will be understanding of their health issues.
Don’t let things that have happened stop you from living as full of a life as you can, it is important that even with having health issues to find joy in life. Life is always going to have its difficulties, but it is how we handle it and our attitude that makes the difference in our lives. Bearing one’s soul through being open is a difficult task, but something we all need to do, we are made to have relationships, and it is important that we are honest including our health issues that can cause difficulties or hardships in said relationships. Continue to be strong even if that means admitting you are weak because of your health, it will make a difference in your life.